Thursday, March 25, 2010

What I’m Reading Today: Luke 8:1-25

As I have mentioned several times in my blog, I am an individual who is in the process of recovering from co-dependence. When I say that to others, they asking what I mean by the word codependence. My most direct response is: “Codependence is when you depend upon others to determine how you think and feel.”

So how does this look in real life?

When I’m in a codependent place, for instance, I start thinking: “If I’m doing a good job as a pastor then both the individuals within the church and the church itself will grow.”

As long as individuals and the church are growing, then I’m in a good headspace. When individuals or the church goes through a difficult time, however, I begin to turn on myself and accept complete responsibility for the situation. I wish I could say such thinking has been rare for me; sadly, however, that’s a road I’ve gone down that path more than I’d like to admit.

In today’s parable from the Gospel of Luke, Jesus’ words remind me of an important point. There are more factors in the equation than I tend to remember. There’s the sower (i.e. me); there’s the seed (i.e. the Message); and there’s the ground (i.e. the individuals and the church). Each of those three elements must be willing to do their part in order to produce a healthy environment. One of those elements can’t step forward and absolve the others of their responsibility. Each element must claim its share. In other words, we’re all in it together. When I ground myself in the wisdom of that principle, I become not only a health pastor – but a healthy person as well.

All of this makes me wonder if there are areas in your life where your thinking might be codependent? Areas in which you are holding yourself accountable not only for your own behavior but for the response of another/others as well. If so, remember the Parable of the Sower. It will remind you to focus on your own piece of the process. Let others accept responsibility for themselves.

Til next time…