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What I'm Reading Today: Numbers 6-8

Today's passage contained a very detailed list of what each leader decided to present in the process of dedicating the Altar. Nahshon, for instance, decided to bring offerings that ranged from a silver plate weighing 3-1/4 pounds to a young bull. The other eleven leaders brought gifts that were very similar.

The passage got me to thinking about what it is that I would bring in order to participate in that process of dedication.

As I thought about this, I realized that my contribution wouldn't be a material good like a silver plate or a young bull (though some have accused me of offering up some bull at times); my offering would be an attitudinal one. Here's the contribution I would make.

As someone who regularly participates in Co-Dependents Anonymous, the very First Step challenges me to hold onto the following awareness: "I am powerless over others" and that "my life has become unmanageable." On some days, that can be a tremendously challenging admission to make – for I feel that I am on top of the world and fully capable of managing things, thank you very much! On other days, I feel tremendously beaten down and am more than happy to surrender my illusions of control to God.

Over the last year, with God's help, I have grown tremendously in my willingness to make that admission each day. That is a good thing – because in this society so many things send us the message that the sign of a "good leader" is "being in control". The longer I live – and the more time I spend in ministry – I realize I have to reject those pressures. There are so many variables beyond my control. To fail to acknowledge this would be unreasonable. While the notion of having things beyond my control used to scare the soup out of me, today – at least at this very moment – I feel like I can let go of some of the outcomes before me and trust in the transformative presence of God to see things through.

So if I were asked to participate in that process of presentation that is what I would bring: the honest admission that I am powerless over others and that my life has become unmanageable. That is my gift.

Today I invite you to think about what it is that you would present to God. Have fun exploring that question!

Til next time …l

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