Today’s Lectionary Readings: Psalm 42; Ezekiel 3:16-27; Matthew 14:22-36; 1 Corinthians 15:45-58; Psalm 13
Last summer I turned 40. Since then I’ve been wrestling to learn a valuable lesson. The lesson is how to overcome co-dependence. For those of you unfamiliar with the term, co-dependence is where an individual’s boundaries are blurred and he/she ends up enmeshed with other people. Co-dependent folks, for instance, will often accept responsibility for other people’s feelings or choices. They often feel as if they are both the cause of other people’s problems and the cure to those same problems. Sounds absurd, right? I know it does to a non co-dependent person. To a co-dependent person, however, it makes perfect sense. Needless to say, such an approach toward life is totally overwhelming. Having lived with a co-dependent approach toward life for 40 years, it is a challenge (to say the least) to try to undo these thought processes that continue to haunt me daily. As someone wrestling to establish healthy boundaries, I LOVED today’s passage from Ezekiel. And why do I love it? Because it sets clear boundaries about who is responsible for what. The passage tells us of how Ezekiel received a clear message from God: when you receive a message from God, tell the people what I’ve said. That’s your job. End of story. The people’s job, then, is to pick up the message and run. You are not responsible for their choices after hearing the message; you are only responsible for sharing it. That’s the sort of clarity I love and need in my life. It’s easy for people of faith to slide into co-dependent patterns. We do so not for entirely selfish reasons – we do it because we so desperately want to reach and help people. And in our attempts to do so, we end up losing a healthy sense of balance and perspective. Today, let us give thanks for a God who understands healthy boundaries. Let us then honor God by following God’s examples and establishing healthy boundaries in our own lives as well. Til next time…
Last summer I turned 40. Since then I’ve been wrestling to learn a valuable lesson. The lesson is how to overcome co-dependence. For those of you unfamiliar with the term, co-dependence is where an individual’s boundaries are blurred and he/she ends up enmeshed with other people. Co-dependent folks, for instance, will often accept responsibility for other people’s feelings or choices. They often feel as if they are both the cause of other people’s problems and the cure to those same problems. Sounds absurd, right? I know it does to a non co-dependent person. To a co-dependent person, however, it makes perfect sense. Needless to say, such an approach toward life is totally overwhelming. Having lived with a co-dependent approach toward life for 40 years, it is a challenge (to say the least) to try to undo these thought processes that continue to haunt me daily. As someone wrestling to establish healthy boundaries, I LOVED today’s passage from Ezekiel. And why do I love it? Because it sets clear boundaries about who is responsible for what. The passage tells us of how Ezekiel received a clear message from God: when you receive a message from God, tell the people what I’ve said. That’s your job. End of story. The people’s job, then, is to pick up the message and run. You are not responsible for their choices after hearing the message; you are only responsible for sharing it. That’s the sort of clarity I love and need in my life. It’s easy for people of faith to slide into co-dependent patterns. We do so not for entirely selfish reasons – we do it because we so desperately want to reach and help people. And in our attempts to do so, we end up losing a healthy sense of balance and perspective. Today, let us give thanks for a God who understands healthy boundaries. Let us then honor God by following God’s examples and establishing healthy boundaries in our own lives as well. Til next time…
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