Today’s Readings: Psalm 67; Genesis 43:16-34; Luke 6:12-26; Acts 19:11-20; Psalm 4
As I have shared with you in previous posts, I’m someone who struggles on a daily basis to come to terms with my issues of co-dependence. That’s because I was raised from day one to be a people pleaser. Because of that, I have this sort of impression burned on my psyche that suggests things are automatically okay if people like me or what I’m doing and that things are automatically not okay if people are upset with me or don’t like what I’m doing. In a perfect world where individuals didn’t have hidden agendas or unhealthy needs, I suppose such thinking might work. In the imperfect world in which we live where lots of folks have hidden agendas and unhealthy needs, let me tell you something: “Such an approach does not work!” Of course it took me 40 years to figure that out for myself. If I had carefully read today’s Gospel reading earlier in my life, I might have saved myself some years of painful life experience. In today’s Gospel reading we are told that Jesus’ said: “Count yourself blessed every time someone cuts you down or throws you out, every time someone smears or blackens your name to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and that that person is uncomfortable” (Luke 6:22 – The Message). As I thought about it – especially that second sentence – Jesus’ words make perfect sense: an alcoholic will like you more if you provide them a drink; a control freak will like you more if you give in to their demands; and a self-centered person will like you more if you give them what they want. While each of the persons in these scenarios may like you better if you simply go along, I don’t think you are doing any of them a favor when you do so. It’s only when you have the strength of character to stand up and say things like “No, I won’t give you the drink”, “No, I won’t be intimidated by you and simply give in to your demand”, “No, there are other factors in this decision to consider beside just your opinion” that you bring the truth close to the person. Of course their only natural response will be to become uncomfortable. I don’t know if you have a similar struggle with a propensity to please others. If you do, remember those words from today’s reading and realize a portion of our call is to bring the truth a little too close for comfort for many – including ourselves. Once you realize this, it’ll help you remember that there are more important things to be worried about than simply being liked by others. Til next time…
As I have shared with you in previous posts, I’m someone who struggles on a daily basis to come to terms with my issues of co-dependence. That’s because I was raised from day one to be a people pleaser. Because of that, I have this sort of impression burned on my psyche that suggests things are automatically okay if people like me or what I’m doing and that things are automatically not okay if people are upset with me or don’t like what I’m doing. In a perfect world where individuals didn’t have hidden agendas or unhealthy needs, I suppose such thinking might work. In the imperfect world in which we live where lots of folks have hidden agendas and unhealthy needs, let me tell you something: “Such an approach does not work!” Of course it took me 40 years to figure that out for myself. If I had carefully read today’s Gospel reading earlier in my life, I might have saved myself some years of painful life experience. In today’s Gospel reading we are told that Jesus’ said: “Count yourself blessed every time someone cuts you down or throws you out, every time someone smears or blackens your name to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and that that person is uncomfortable” (Luke 6:22 – The Message). As I thought about it – especially that second sentence – Jesus’ words make perfect sense: an alcoholic will like you more if you provide them a drink; a control freak will like you more if you give in to their demands; and a self-centered person will like you more if you give them what they want. While each of the persons in these scenarios may like you better if you simply go along, I don’t think you are doing any of them a favor when you do so. It’s only when you have the strength of character to stand up and say things like “No, I won’t give you the drink”, “No, I won’t be intimidated by you and simply give in to your demand”, “No, there are other factors in this decision to consider beside just your opinion” that you bring the truth close to the person. Of course their only natural response will be to become uncomfortable. I don’t know if you have a similar struggle with a propensity to please others. If you do, remember those words from today’s reading and realize a portion of our call is to bring the truth a little too close for comfort for many – including ourselves. Once you realize this, it’ll help you remember that there are more important things to be worried about than simply being liked by others. Til next time…
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